The Start of Something New

Posted by BB | Labels: , , | Posted On 08 February, 2010 at Monday, February 08, 2010

I, Beloved Boyd, am a Gay Mormon Boy and everything I say here is the truth to the best of my knowledge:

Warning!: These stories may be explicit to sensitive minds.

This week is going to be a mild week. I enjoyed my week off, but my life is still pretty busy so I am going to go back further in my memory and share some of my first sexual stirrings and experiences with you.

To start things off, I just wanted to share my name’s meaning with you. From Urban Dictionary – “Boyd; - To be a complete and obviously homosexual human being.“ So I guess, even my name has it out for me as a gay boy.

The first time I can ever remember any sexual fascination it would have been one day when I was 6 or 7. I was in our house in SLC, downstairs in my parent’s room taking a shower with my dad. I don’t know what it was, but while I was learning to take a shower I would look down at my dad’s penis. I can still remember exactly what it looked like but I shall spare you, and myself, the accompanying image.

The first time I remember getting an erection was several years later. I was in the same house, but in my bathroom. It must have been sometime around 6th grade. That was the year I became sure. No, not sure that I was gay, but just sure. You see, that was when I discovered deodorant. Something about the newness of applying deodorant just gave me an erection.

Because of the erection I thought I was doing something wrong. I didn’t understand it and I was ashamed. I stopped using deodorant for several years after that because I didn’t understand what was going on. After that first one, nearly anytime I did something, even just in looking at myself in the mirror, I would pop a woody.

The first time that, now looking back, I can remember wanting to act on my attractions and look at other guys was actually before my first erection. I was at the public pool with Nicholas and his brothers. We were faced with a decision of two doors. The first was the family friendly male locker room, meant for those under 18 or families. The next was the adult male locker room for those older than 18.

I remember nudging Nicholas or his brother and saying we should go into the 18 and older room. I never said why, but looking back I can remember my thoughts and knew that I wanted in so I could see other guys. I never voiced it, but this is what I wanted, this is what I had desired.

This was the start of something new and this week I will share more stories like these three.


There are 6 Words of Warning for The Start of Something New